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Arizona Guide to Keeping Your Head out of Your Ass

Arizona Guide to Keeping Your Head out of Your Ass

By Arizona Reporter

Keeping your head out of your ass and your eyes on the road.

From time to time we receive emails from people bitching about drivers in Arizona. With those emails, explicit details of infused rage is clearly described in well, an indecent manner and we just cleaned it up a bit, just a bit.

The Arizona Reporter presents a quick user guide for not only the residents of Arizona, but more for those visiting snowbirds, the elderly, the elderly on drugs, kids, kids on drugs, crackheads, the future DUI convicts, and the all around jackass who barely passed drivers education.

Clue #1 For keeping your head out of your ass.
"Nice Fuc*&$# Blinker, I should get one for my truck!"
Use your friggin blinker!
It does not matter how quick you intend on cutting us off, use the damn blinker and let us know that your going to cut us off, that way we have sufficient time for preparing a proper gesture for you.

Clue #2 For keeping your head out of your ass.
Just because your car can fit in front of me at 80 mph does not mean you have to put it there!
Most of us drivers try to leave a couple of car lengths between vehicles on the highway as a safe distance. But, you insist on pulling in there, causing everyone to hit the breaks and some of you actually cause collissions! Get a friggin clue Bubba! It's a safe distance, we were not letting you in!

Clue #3 For keeping your head out of your ass.
Hey, the GAS pedal is on the RIGHT, passing lane is on the left!
Yo! just because you did not see a sign stating, "Keep right except to pass" does not mean you should stay in the left lane and continue going ten miles per hour slower than everyone else.

Clue #4 For keeping your head out of your ass.
Yellow lights mean SLOW and Prepare to STOP, NOT Step On It!

Attorney Kathleen Carey

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